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Today April 18, 2014

Odd Man Out

Written by Rudy on April 18, 2014 - 8:27 am -

The Rudy Report would like to point out that the shirt you are wearing (if you are wearing one) looks great, today on "National Golf Day." Anyways, teamwork is a good thing. It always consist of one person doing all the work and teammates standing around doing nothing. Just watch out for the infiltrators....


Despite concerns, officials in Rio have confirmed that the planning for the 2016 Summer Olympics is on track. In Game 1 of the NHL Playoffs, the New York Rangers beat Philadelphia. And, in baseball, the New York Yankees beat Tampa Bay.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Scott Hartnell, Robyn Regehr, Michael Bradley, Haile Gebrselassie, and Polish tongue-twisting soccer sensation Wojciech Szczesny. On this day in 1923, the original Yankee Stadium opened. Have a great weekend, there is no new Dear Rudy at the moment, but you can learn something interesting about aluminum in the Random Fact section!

Big Bucks - A group of New York-based investment experts has purchased NBA franchise Milwaukee Bucks for approximately $550 million. Read here.

Done Deal - Atlanta Falcons owner Arthur Blank has successfully acquired an MLS expansion franchise for the city, expected to start play in 2017. Read here.

It Stinks

Written by Rudy on April 17, 2014 - 6:53 am -

Compared to the Rudy Report, Russia looks very, very small, because we took over the world many years ago and have since dominated sports and lifestyle reporting, like today on "National High Five Day." Well, as you know, typos can cause World Wars. But it could be much worse than that. It could cost you the effect of an advertisement investment and that stinks, literally....


In addition to Toni Kroos, Manchester United are also said to be interested in Dortmund striker Marco Reus. Meanwhile, Atletico Madrid star Diego Costa is set to join Chelsea for 60 million Euros. The New York Rangers will take on Philadelphia in the NHL Playoffs today. In baseball, the New York Yankees beat the Cubs twice. Lamar Odom will be joining the New York Knicks. And you thought things couldn't get worse... Meanwhile, in the NBA's season finale, the Knicks beat Toronto, while Brooklyn lost against Cleveland.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Boomer Esiason, Roddy Piper, Jo-Wilfried Tsonga, and Sri Lankan cricket legend Muttiah Muralitharan. On this day in 1964, the Ford Mustang was introduced to the North American market. Have a great day, there is no new Dear Rudy right now, but learn something about the baseball that you did not know before in the Random Fact section!

Trump Card - If Donald Trump is successful at buying the Buffalo Bills, he is likely to be approved by the National Football League as an owner. Read here.

Gender Explained

Written by Rudy on April 16, 2014 - 6:22 am -

A good report is harder to find than the black box of a Malaysian Airlines plane, but the Rudy Report delivers the ping signal that you desperately need every day, like today on "National Don't Go To Work Unless It's Fun Day." Anyways, there are obviously differences between men and women. Many experts have tried to explain what it is that sets us apart. Well, this picture right here offers a pretty good analysis....


The New York Jets are said to be close to signing free agent running back Chris Johnson. Meanwhile, Knicks star Amar'e Stoudemire may leave the team to play in Israel next year, for a team that he co-owns. MLS team New York City FC will play its first three seasons at Yankee Stadium. And, in the NBA, the New York Knicks beat Brooklyn.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Bill Belichick, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Pierre Littbarski, Conchita Martinez, and German pole-vaulting legend Lars Boergeling. On this day in 1929, the New York Yankees became the first baseball team to wear uniform numbers. Have a great day, there is still the new Dear Rudy about a dirty baseball pitcher, and find out something interesting about bungee jumping in the Random Fact section!

Real Deal - Donald Trump has stated that his interest in buying NFL franchise Buffalo Bills is real, and that he wants to keep the team in the region. Read here.

At Risk - Soccer clubs Paris Saint-Germain and Manchester City are under investigation by UEFA's Financial Fair Play committee and may get penalized soon. Read here.

Beating The Dead Horse

Written by Rudy on April 15, 2014 - 6:17 am -

While you are rushing to submit your income tax returns, the Rudy Report wants to assure you that we will always be tax-free, so enjoy this harbor of happiness, today on "National Take a Wild Guess Day." Anyways, news reporting is a skill. We openly admit that we do a great job and never make mistakes. Others seem to be a bit less sophisticated with their reporting....


The NHL playoffs will begin tomorrow. The New York Rangers will take on the Philadelphia Flyers in their first game on Thursday. NFL star Shawne Merriman has joined the WWE. And, there are rumors that Tiger Woods will also have to miss the US Open due to his back problems.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Ilya Kovalchuk, Frank Schleck, Milton Bradley, Jason Sehorn, and Ghanaian soccer sensation Quincy Owusu-Abeyie. On this day in 1924, Rand McNally published its first road atlas. It was the paper version of Google Maps. Have a great day, there is still the brand-new Dear Rudy from baseball expert Hank the Tank, and find out what the Philippines and Vatican City have in common in the Random Fact section!

New League - A new soccer league in India is attracting prominent investors for the first franchises, looking to tap a billion dollar market. Read here.

Do It Yourself Edition

Written by Rudy on April 14, 2014 - 8:32 am -

The Rudy Report is proud to announce that we have now more Twitter followers than the Federal Reserve, which makes a strong statement about who influences the economy the most, today on "National Pecan Day." Anyways, hiring someone to do work in your home is so 2013. 2014 is the year of doing it yourself! If you need help, grab a friend and start remodeling now....


Bubba Watson won the Masters for the second time, three shots ahead of the competition. In the Champions League semi-finals, favorite Bayern Munich will take on Real Madrid. The other game will be between Atletico Madrid and Chelsea. In the Premier League, Liverpool beat Manchester City 3-2 in the top game. In the NBA, the New York Knicks beat Chicago. And, in baseball, the New York Yankees beat Boston again, while the Mets got crushed by the Los Angeles Angels.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Greg Maddux, Anderson Silva, David Justice, Pete Rose, and Canadian race walking legend Guillaume LeBlanc. On this day in 1828, Noah Webster copyrighted the first edition of his dictionary. Have a great week, there is a brand-new Dear Rudy about a recent baseball controversy, and learn something about pumping gas in the Random Fact section!

Rockin' Buffalo - Jon Bon Jovi and Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment are reportedly interested in buying NFL franchise Buffalo Bills together as early as October. Read here.