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Today April 29, 2017

Know Your Sources

Written by Rudy on March 19, 2012 - 3:53 am -

You should sometimes try to read the Rudy Report on the subway, because then people will start talking to you (Note: Please refrain from doing so in questionable parts of town), unless, of course, there is no subway in your town, today on "National Awkward Moments Day." As you know, the Rudy Report is a great source of integrity and style. While we always (well, sometimes) check our sources, not everyone is as thorough when it comes to making judgments...


In the UEFA Champions League quarterfinals, AC Milan will take on FC Barcelona in the top match. The top game in the Europa League quarterfinals will be Schalke against Bilbao. In the Premier League, Manchester United beat Wolverhampton 5-0. All other significant teams will play on Wednesday. Andy Pettitte has come out of retirement to rejoin the New York Yankees. In the NHL, the New York Rangers lost against Colorado on Saturday, while the Islanders beat Montreal. In the NBA, the Knicks beat Indiana. And, in March Madness, there were some surprises, like the elimination of Duke and Connecticut, but we won't report much more until things get really interesting in the Final Four.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Clayton Kershaw, Alessandro Nesta, Andy Reid, and New Zealandian cricket test wicket-keeper (no that's not a role from Lord of the Rings) Warren Lees. On this day in 1931, gambling was legalized in Nevada. You all know what happened next... Have a great day, there is no new Dear Rudy right now, but discover something interesting about Angelina Jolie's uncle in the Random Fact section!

Deal Appeal - Two former bidders for the Los Angeles Dodgers are appealing the decision that their bids got rejected. Read here.

Sale Denial - Executives at the Portland Trail Blazers are denying rumors that billionaire Paul Allen is positioning the franchise for a sale. Read here. 

The Diversity Edition

Written by Rudy on March 16, 2012 - 9:33 am -

It's Friday, and if you don't have any plans yet for the weekend, you better read this Rudy Report really slowly to stretch out the fun over a few days until Monday, starting today on "National Lips Appreciation Day." As you know, the Rudy Report is the most tolerant publication in the world, discriminating against everyone equally. While we celebrate all cultures throughout the year, there are some people and organizations that have themed months...


Running back Peyton Hillis has signed with the Kansas City Chiefs. Meanwhile,, the Washington Redskins made a trade with St. Louis to get the No. 2 draft pick and a chance to sign Heisman Trophy winner quarterback Robert Griffin III. In the Europa League. Manchester City and Manchester United got eliminated as two German and three Spanish teams advanced to the quarterfinals. March Madness started last night and there were almost no surprises. And, in the NHL, the Rangers lost against Pittsburgh, while the Islanders did not win against Philadelphia.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Theo Walcott, Toney Douglas, Curtis Granderson, and Irish legendary and openly gay elite hurler Donal Og Cusack (yes, Donal, not Donald). On this day in 1872, Wanderers FC won the first FA Cup, the oldest soccer competition in the world. Have a great weekend, there is no new Dear Rudy right now, but find out how panda bears can lose weight in the Random Fact section!

Stronger Group - Mandalay Entertainment CEO Peter Guber has joined Magic Johnson's group in their bid to acquire the Los Angeles Dodgers. Read here.

Burden Of Proof - The owner of the New York Mets are the ones that have to prove that they did not know anything about the Madoff scam. Read here. 

False Advertising

Written by Rudy on March 15, 2012 - 9:05 am -

The Rudy Report is already in its fifth calendar year online, which is an eternity for the virtual world, and that's great, today on "National Companies That Care Day." You know the situation: You see a sign and it looks great, so you go into a place and you don't get what you expect. That happens a lot during SoHo sample sales, but it also happens all over the world...


Carmelo Anthony was unhappy with the coach and wanted to leave the New York Knicks, but Mike D'Antoni came first and resigned from his position. Phil Jackson could come on as the new coach. The change seemed to be good for the team as the Knicks beat Portland at Madison Square Garden. By the way, Dwight Howard now says he does not want to be traded. Can he make up his mind? In the Champions League, Real Madrid and Chelsea were the last two teams to qualify for the quarterfinals.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Darcy Tucker, Kevin Youkilis, Mike Tomlin, and Japanese competitive eating legend Takeru "Tsunami" Kobayashi. On this day in 1906, Rolls-Royce was incorporated. Have a great day, there is no new Dear Rudy at the moment, but find out which item is the world's largest on any restaurant menu in the Random Fact section!

Crunch Time - Magic Johnson and his group are the lead bidders for the Los Angeles Dodgers, offering $1.6 billion as two more groups are eliminated. Read here.

Getting It Done - The sale of the St. Louis Blues is progressing slowly, but will be completed in a timely manner as the team succeeds on the ice. Read here. 

Cultural Differences

Written by Rudy on March 14, 2012 - 1:06 am -

A new study has found that reading the Rudy Report is very healthy, because many people have found reading it reduces their appetite tremendously, which is kind of nice, today on "National Learn About Butterflies Day." The Rudy Report is read around the world, appealing to virtually every culture on the planet. However, some aren't that lucky. There can be vast cultural differences between the peoples of the world...


It looks like Dwight Howard will join the Nets in their move to Brooklyn. Russian hockey league KHL will play some regular season games in the United States, starting with the new Barclays Center in Brooklyn (S0 much Brooklyn, huh?!?!). Wide receiver Randy Moss has signed a contract with the San Francisco 49ers. In the UEFA Champions League, Bayern Munich cruised to the next round with a crushing 7-0 victory against Basel. Marseille eliminated Inter Milan. And, in the NHL, the New York Rangers beat Carolina, while the Islanders lost against Washington.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Larry Johnson, Stephen Curry, George Wilson, and Dutch swimming legend Pieter Cornelis Ruud Martijn van den Hoogenband (featured with his full name today). On this day in 1960, Wilt Chamberlain set an NBA playoff record of 53 points in a game. Have a great day, there is no new Dear Rudy right now, but learn something about Whitney Houston that you did not know for sure in the Random Fact section!

Another One Goes - Major League Baseball has reduced the number of bidders for the Los Angeles Dodgers to six, with Steve Cohen bidding $1.4 billion, including $900 million in equity. Read here.

Small Stake - A 7% minority stake in the Sacramento Kings is currently for sale due to the personal bankruptcy of the stakeholder. Read here.

Just A Rumor - The owner of the Oakland Athletics has denied any rumors that the franchise may be for sale with two parties submitting bids. Read here.

The Bandwagon Fan

Written by Rudy on March 13, 2012 - 9:12 am -

A new rumor suggests that the recent outrage in Afghanistan was not caused by the burning of the Quran, but by the deletion of a Rudy Report, which is understandable, today on "National Open an Umbrella Indoors Day." As you know, the Rudy Report never jumps on hypes, fiercely protecting its journalistic reputation. However, there are fans that only show up when teams are doing well. We're talking about the fans that don't come to games when their team is losing. They are called the bandwagon fans...


It looks like Peyton Manning will make a decision about his next team soon, and it may be the Arizona Cardinals or the Denver Broncos. March Madness is officially starting on Thursday. And, in the NBA, the Knicks lost against Chicago.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Caron Butler, Holger Badstuber, Marco Andretti, and Swedish tennis legend Thomas Enqvist. On this day in 2008, gold prices on the New York Mercantile Exchange hit $1,000 per ounce for the first time. Those were the days... Have a great day, there is no new Dear Rudy right now, but find out which former US President had some real skills in the Random Fact section!

Paying A Visit - Billionaire Steve Cohen has visited the Dodgers' spring training facility as he is the favorite in the bidding, which will have final submissions due on Friday. Read here.

Two For The Money - There seem to be two separate investor groups that are interested in making a bid for the Oakland A's, but the team is not for sale right now. Read here.